


Sleep Away the Toils of Battle

by ShowMeAHero



Series: The Smithsonian [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers Family, Avengers Tower, Breakfast, Canon Deaf Character, Deaf Character, Deaf Clint Barton, Domestic, Domestic Avengers, Fluff, Gen, Humor, M/M, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Prompt Fill, So yeah, and bucky eats red velvet pop-tarts godDAMNit, and bucky is a snarky asshole, because everything is okay and happy and nothing hurts, but i mean, but they need not be, maybe a lil bit crack fic, not enough that it doesn't count as a story, steve isn't up at asscrack o'clock and the other avengers are concerned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-12
Updated: 2014-05-12
Packaged: 2018-01-24 11:06:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1602923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShowMeAHero/pseuds/ShowMeAHero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha folded her newspaper and set it down on the table, then leaned around Clint to get a better look at Steve.<br/>Steve, who usually woke up at five in the morning as a rule, or as an old habit, went for a jog, returned to the Tower, showered, dressed, and was in the kitchen looking ready for the day by eight at the latest.<br/>Steve, who none of them had seen the torso of unless he was sparring for too long and got too hot, or his clothes were otherwise ripped in battle, or they were swimming.<br/>Steve, who, at the moment, was clearly not showered, as his hair was a blonde mess that he ran his fingers through nervously as they all unabashedly stared at him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleep Away the Toils of Battle

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by [this post](http://starlorde.tumblr.com/post/85175869109/everyone-thinking-steve-is-this-gentleman) by starlorde on tumblr, which said:
> 
> "everyone thinking Steve is this gentleman everywhere and sort of a blushing virgin but one morning he walks into the kitchen of avengers mansion like an hour later before everyone else his hair is a mess he has a robe half on with some underwear underneath and has bruises everywhere from his neck to his hips and everyone just stares in shock and Bucky comes in and he’s 200% worse"
> 
> I wrote it. Ta-da.

“Should someone check on him?” Natasha asked. Clint frowned at her until she sighed, held up her finger and thumb, then just her finger, jerked her fist, and went to retrieve his hearing aids for him.

“I don’t know,” Bruce said, looking down into his mug of some organic tea with a lot of adjectives, German Chamomile Mint Herbal something. “He might just need sleep. It happens. Besides, it’s Sunday, it’s not like we were doing anything anyways.”

Natasha returned with Clint’s hearing aids, setting them down on the kitchen table in front of him. He ruffled Natasha’s not-yet-straightened hair in response, but she only batted his hand away. He grinned as he set about putting his hearing aids in.

“I, for one, believe we should let Steven rest,” Thor chimed in as he broke a Strawberry Pop-Tart in half and handed one of the halves to Bruce. Bruce smiled and took a bite of it, leaning back in his kitchen chair. “It is not uncommon for a warrior to sleep away the toils of battle.”

“That would be a better excuse if our last battle wasn’t two weeks ago, Thor,” Clint pointed out, his hearing aids finally in, as Tony dragged himself into the kitchen and made a beeline straight for the coffee machine.

“What’re you talking about?” Tony asked, running a hand through his bed-head hair as he waited for the coffee to pour itself into his mug.

“Steve’s not up yet,” Bruce explained, and Tony raised an eyebrow as he hopped up onto the counter and pulled his coffee mug close to himself.

“That’s weird,” Tony mumbled, looking around for a clock. “What time is it?”

“Nine-oh-three, sir,” JARVIS answered, and Tony frowned.

“And did Cap’n Crunch go for a run this morning?” Tony asked, and Clint laughed once.

“No, sir,” JARVIS replied. Tony raised an eyebrow as he took a sip from his mug.

“That’s weird,” Bruce said quietly. Thor shrugged.

“As I said, it is common for one to sleep after battle or other such rigorous activity,” Thor said, and Clint straightened up. Natasha looked up from her newspaper at him, then decided not to bother and looked back down.

“No, you said “sleep away the toils of battle,”” Clint remarked, looking straight at Thor. “You added “other such rigorous activity” this time. What do you mean?”

Thor laughed loudly. “Only that Steven may have been involved in other activities. You are well versed in such matters, Clinton, I should not have to explain such a thing to you.”

The kitchen was silent for a moment before Bruce snickered. Clint glared at him, which only made Natasha laugh from behind her newspaper.

“Yeah, but, Thor, this is _Captain America_ ,” Tony reminded him, patiently. “This isn’t Clint, or you, or me.” Tony squinted in Natasha’s direction when she laughed, but otherwise ignored her. “He probably just stayed up too late or something. There’s always the chance that he-”

“What’re we talking about?” Steve asked tiredly as he entered the kitchen. Bruce looked up at Steve and calmly set his mug back down on the table, even as the room fell silent. Tony openly gaped.

“Uhm. Nothing,” Clint answered. Natasha folded her newspaper and set it down on the table, then leaned around Clint to get a better look at Steve. Steve, who usually woke up at five in the morning as a rule, or as an old habit, went for a jog, returned to the Tower, showered, dressed, and was in the kitchen looking ready for the day by eight at the latest. Steve, who none of them had seen the torso of unless he was sparring for too long and got too hot, or his clothes were otherwise ripped in battle, or they were swimming. Steve, who, at the moment, was clearly _not_ showered, as his hair was a blonde mess that he ran his fingers through nervously as they all unabashedly stared at him.

His hair and lack of shower were not his biggest problems, though, nor were they his most obvious. He was far from dressed, wearing a pair of boxers and a thin robe that was untied and barely even on. This, still, was not the most dramatic new aspect of his appearance; that title went to the _bruises_. He was _covered_ in them, from his neck to his hips, and, Tony strongly suspected, there were plenty more bruises _underneath_ the boxers. When Natasha looked over Steve’s body, he glanced down, then raised his eyebrows at himself.

“Oh,” Steve said simply. “I-”

“What’s everyone so quiet for?” Bucky asked, ambling into the kitchen, and Tony slid off the counter onto his feet. Bruce’s brow furrowed, and he covered his mouth with his hand to hide his laughter. Bucky looked _at least_ two hundred percent worse than Steve did, wearing _only_ boxers, not a robe in sight, his long hair pulled back into a messy ponytail/bun thing, his skin a veritable  _mess_ of bruises, obvious hickeys and dark fingertip impressions. There were a few bruises along the scarred edge where his torso met his metal arm that were rather impressive, and Natasha whistled.

Steve’s face turned a little red when he looked Bucky over, but he otherwise remained somewhat unphased by the whole thing. Bucky raised an eyebrow at Steve, then leaned forward to close his robe.

“Is it ‘cause Steve’s givin’ everyone a free show?” Bucky inquired cheekily, grinning. He reached up and caught the package of Pop-Tarts that Thor flinged at him - Red Velvet, because he’s worth it - with his metal hand.

“I…” Tony managed, clearly short-circuiting. He set his mug down on the counter. “I don’t even know what to say.”

“ _‘Good morning’_ would probably be a good start,” Bucky supplied helpfully, falling into one of the empty chairs at the kitchen table while Steve set about getting coffee for the two of them. “Then maybe _‘How did you sleep?’_ after that.”

“How you two slept seems like kind of a moot point at this juncture,” Bruce pointed out, and Clint lost it, his head banging on the table as he half-choked, half-laughed. Bucky just raised an eyebrow at him while Steve continued making coffee.

“By golly, Steve, I think they’re making innuendos,” Bucky said over his shoulder, and Steve laughed.

“Observant this morning, are we,” Steve commented, and Bucky turned to frown at him. The frown fell away when Steve set his coffee mug down in front of him, then sat down in the empty chair beside him, gripping his own mug tightly. When the stares continued, particularly from Tony, who had crept around to the table and still had a pale, wide-eyed, deer-in-the-headlights look about him, Steve and Bucky sighed simultaneously.

“Alright, get it out of your systems,” Steve encouraged dryly, motioning for Tony to speak. Tony just stared for a moment before he cleared his throat.

“But he-” Tony began, then shook his head, starting over. “But he- But you- But _I_ would have- But you’re _Captain America_ ,” Tony finally managed, and Steve’s brow furrowed.

“What does that have to do with it?” Steve asked, and, when Bucky muttered, “A _lot_ , actually,” Steve just elbowed him. Tony just made a choking sound and gestured urgently at Bucky.

“Stark, have you blown a fuse?” Bucky asked. Tony’s eyebrows both raised.

“Have I blown a fuse?” Tony repeated incredulously. “Have _I_? Have _you_ blown a fuse? What the _hell_?”

Steve’s expression suddenly lightened with understanding. “Ahh. Tony, you didn’t…” He glanced over at Natasha, then at Bruce. Clint grinned widely at him. Thor continued to eat, even as he watched. “You didn’t think I was a virgin, did you?”

“Kind of, yeah,” Tony answered immediately. Bucky snorted, then choked on his coffee. Steve whacked him on the back.

“I’ve never met someone who was _less_ of a virgin,” Bucky coughed, and Steve made an unimpressed face at him before turning back to Tony.

“Tony, I was in my twenties when my plane went down,” Steve reminded him. “And I was in the army. _And_ I’ve been here for a few years now. I’m-”

“ _Captain America_ ,” Tony said urgently, and Bucky laughed.

“That helps,” Bucky added, and Steve tried, unsuccessfully, not to smile.

“You’re such a gentleman,” Clint added, and Bucky grinned.

“Not everywhere,” Bucky said, winking dramatically, and Steve punched his arm. Bucky laughed and took another drink of coffee.

“I can’t do this,” Tony muttered. He threw his hands up in the air and exclaimed, “I can’t, I can’t do this!”. He grabbed his coffee and pointed at Steve. “You,” he managed. He paused, frowned, and left. Thor held out the Strawberry Pop-Tart box, and Steve took one.

“Thanks, Thor,” Steve said, and Thor beamed at him.

“You are quite welcome,” Thor assured him. “Many congratulations on your virility.”

Clint fell out of his chair.

**Author's Note:**

> Natasha's weird hand motions at the beginning actually come together to mean "hold on" in ASL.
> 
> You can follow me on Twitter at [@nicoIodeon](https://twitter.com/nicoIodeon) or on Tumblr at [andillwriteyouatragedy](http://andillwriteyouatragedy.tumblr.com/).


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